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The Lost Boy
Dave Pelzer
1558745157
Jan 1997
Paperback
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From Library Journal
Following A Child Called It (Health Communications, 1995), which was nominated for a Pulitzer Prize and appears frequently on high school reading lists, this is the second in a planned trilogy from motivational author and speaker Pelzer. Here he tells his story from the time he left his abusive mother and alcoholic father, through his experiences in five foster homes and juvenile detention, and how he eventually made it into the Air Force. He was a defiant, rebellious boy who, despite his background and personality, managed to endear himself to many guardians, social workers, and teachers. Pelzer writes in an honest, sometimes rambling, style; he is never bitter, and his story will find many sympathetic readers. However, he leaves many questions unanswered (which may appear in the third book), dealing with his...


Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship
Christine Ann Lawson
0765703319
January 2002
Paperback
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(Christina Crawford, 2000)
"The compassionate understanding and professional assistance in this book are a road map out of failure." --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

(Peter L. Giovacchini, 2000)
"...wonderfully readable...The writing is concise and simple, although the subject is complex and weighty." --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

See all Editorial Reviews


Toxic Parents
Susan Forward
0553381407
Jan 2002
Paperback
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Book Review
All parents fall short from time to time. But Susan Forward pulls no punches when it comes to those whose deficiencies cripple their children emotionally. Her brisk, unreserved guide to overcoming the stultifying agony of parental manipulation--from power trips to guilt trips and all other killers of self worth--will help deal with the pain of childhood and move beyond the frustrating relationship patterns learned at home. --This text refers to the Paperback edition.

Review
“A dynamic, powerful, hard-hitting book. It offers tremendous hope as well as understanding. It could truly be a lifesaver.”
— Abigail Van Buren, “Dear Abby”

“I consider Susan Forward to be among the foremost therapists of our age.”
— John...


The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family
Eleanor Payson
0972072837
October 1, 2002
Paperback
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Book Description
Every day headlines are filled with examples of narcissistic individuals in positions of power who are nothing more than impostors plundering and wrecking havoc on the lives of others. From the corporate moguls of Enron and WorldCom to the clergy leaders of the Catholic Church, we daily encounter narcissists and the self-serving systems that enable them. Helping people reclaim their lives from this sinister exploitative force is the mission behind Payson’s book, The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family. Using simple metaphors from the American classic, The Wizard of Oz, Payson illustrates how Dorothy’s journey captures all the seductive illusions and challenges that occur when we encounter the narcissist. Empowering the reader with the ABCs of...


Children of the Self-Absorbed
Nina W. Brown
1572242310
January 2001
Paperback
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Book Description
Millions of adults grew up with immature, self-absorbed parents who made their own children responsible for their physical and emotional well-being, expected admiration and constant attention, and reacted with criticism and blame when their slightest need went unmet. In this accessible book, psychologist Nina Brown helps grown children come to terms with the results of such an upbringing, including tendencies to overcomply to others' needs, withdraw when someone needs nurturing, and lack self-esteem. Through self-exploration exercises and protective and coping strategies, Brown helps readers work toward developing a "healthy narcissism" by identifying destructive patterns their parents may have had, evaluating attitudes and behaviors that may be hampering their own adult relationships, dealing with self-doubt and other...


I'm OK, You're My Parents: How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger, and Create a Relationship That Works
Dale Atkins
0641636628

Hardcover
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Why Does He Do That
Lundy Bancroft
0425191656
Sept 2003
Paperback
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From Publishers Weekly
This fascinating investigation into what makes abusive men tick is alarming, but its candid handling of a difficult subject makes it a valuable resource for professionals and victims alike. Bancroft, the former codirector of Emerge, the nation's first program for abusive men, has specialized in domestic violence for 15 years, and his understanding of his subject and audience is apparent on every page. "One of the prevalent features of life with an angry or controlling partner is that he frequently tells you what you should think and tries to get you to doubt or devalue your own perceptions and beliefs," he writes. "I would not like to see your experience with this book re-create that unhealthy dynamic. So the top point to bear in mind as you read [this book] is to listen carefully to what I am saying, but always...


The Intimacy Struggle : Revised and Expanded for All Adults
Janet Woititz
1558742778
October 1, 1993
Paperback
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Book Description
The struggle for intimacy is a complex issue, key to the happiness of every man and woman. It goes on for all of us as long as we live. To be intimate is to be close, to be vulnerable, qualities that are very different from the survival skills we learned. This book will help clarify the issues for you. You can learn to: Identify family myths to make you wonder whether having a healthy, intimate relationship is possible. Know the questions to ask to find out whether you and your partner have a long-term future together. Be aware of misunderstandings that can sabotage your relationship. Express your feelings and fears so as to avoid misunderstandings. Find our what to do when your relationship is not working. Create good relationships. Acquiring intimacy skills can be difficult, but through understanding and...


Healing the Trauma of Domestic Violence
Edward S. Kubany
1572243694
Jan 2003
Paperback
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Book Description
In this step-by-step guide for recovery, domestic violence experts show how cognitive behavioural therapy can help women with PTSD overcome their trauma and regain control of their lives.

From the Publisher
Step-by-step exercises for recovering from the abuse you’ve endured and taking back your life. · Two domestic violence experts offer the first-ever PTSD treatment approach to help abused women overcome the trauma they have endured and regain control of their lives. · This is the only book on the market that discusses CBT as a therapy to treat PTSD from domestic violence and abuse.

See all Editorial Reviews


Coping with Your Difficult Older Parent: A Guide For Stressed-Out Children
Grace Lebow
038079750X
January 1999
Paperback
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Book Description
...addresses common traits and issues that arise when adult children must cope with the demands of a critical and difficult aging parent.

About the Author
Grace Lebow and Barbara Kane, the co-founders of Aging Network Services of Bethesda, Maryland, are clinical social workers and care managers, specializing in older people and their families. They created a nationwide network of similar professionals to work with geographically separated families. This is their first book.


Getting Free
Ginny NiCarthy
1580051227
Oct 2004
Paperback
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Book Review
Although Getting Free was written in 1982, it is still called the bible of all domestic violence texts. It's not just the content of the book--twenty-four chapters covering a gamut of issues--but the tone. The problems of and solutions to domestic violence are clearly defined through the voices of women as they share their experiences and carve out their steps toward freedom.

Each chapter discusses a different phase in the experience of "getting free" and the problems surrounding each phase. Readers can reach for this book to look up specific domestic abuse issues or they can read it straight through. There is much to learn here--the history of battering as a phenomenon; the political and social aspects of abuse; the historical changes to the institutions of marriage and family, and more.

Chapter 4,...



Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families
John C. Friel
0932194532
January 1990
Paperback
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Book Description
It is estimated that as many as 34 million people grew up in alcoholic homes. But what about the rest of us? What about families that had no alcoholism, but did have perfectionism, workaholism, compulsive overeating, intimacy problems, depression, problems in expressing feelings, plus all the other personality traits that can produce a family system much like an alcoholic one? Countless millions of us struggle with these kinds of dysfunctions every day, and until very recently we struggled alone. Pulling together both theory and clinical practice, John and Linda Friel provide a readable explanation of what happened to us and how we can rectify it.

About the Author
John C. Friel is a psychologist in private practice and is director of the St. Paul/Minneapolis Lifeworks...


Hello, My Name Is Mommy: The Dysfunctional Girl's Guide to Having, Loving (and Hopefully Not Screwing Up) a Baby
Sheri Lynch
0312318324
April 2004
Paperback
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Book Description
Hilarious and true and inspirational, Hello, My Name is Mommy is for every pregnant woman and new mother who ever felt helpless and out of control instead of confident and aglow.

Sure, women know pregnancy is no bed of roses, but Lynch taps into her own dysfunctional childhood and fears about becoming a mom to label a much profounder worry many moms-to-be have: that their own pasts were so screwed up that they're doomed to repeat the cycle. Dr. Spock may tell moms to trust their instincts, but Lynch's Misfit Mommies want to do every last thing but that. They feel like frauds and imposters, and Lynch's real-girl's voice will be instantly recognizable to them. Lynch will walk and talk new moms through it all: from lamenting the hot dogs and second-hand smoke they were raised on (and, of course, "you...


Not to People Like Us
Susan Weitzman
0465090745
Sept 2001
Paperback
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From Publishers Weekly
Chicago's affluent North Shore provides 20-year veteran psychotherapist Weitzman with abundant evidence of the secret lives of "upscale domestic abusers" and their victim-wives. Shattering the cultural myth that emotional and physical violence in the home is confined to couples of a lower socioeconomic class, the author presents vivid case histories that are often excluded from clinical studies and statistics. Lacking a frame of reference for domestic violence in this echelon, health-care professionals ignore the signs, while law enforcement agents and judges go easy on it, she contends. Few believe or sympathize with a well-dressed, bejeweled woman if she finds the courage and self-respect to speak out against her successful, respected, powerful and often charming husband, while battered women's shelters turn...


Narcissistic Family: Diagnosis and Treatment
Stephanie Donaldson-Pressman
0787908703
January 1997
Textbook Paperback
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Review
"The authors have skilfully presented an often difficult topic in an easy-to-read work which will be of value to helpers at any stage of their professional development." (Anglican Theological Review)

?So readable and chock full of understandable case examples that it demands to be shared with patients. It focuses on the conduct of parents and their children trying to make sense out of their chaotic lifestyles in search of love, self-esteem, acceptance, and inner peace. Its valuable insights can be potent reinforcers of the therapeutic experience.? (Jack G. Wiggins, Ph.D., past president, American Psychological Association)

?Such a find. The concept is an artful and practical synthesis that bears effective witness to the authors' depth of knowledge of contemporary psychotherapeutic literature.? (Joseph R....



Don't Let Your Kids Kill You: A Guide for Parents of Drug and Alcohol Addicted Children
Charles Rubin
096797903X
August 2003
Paperback
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If You Had Controlling Parents
Dan Neuharth
0060929324
Oct 1999
Paperback
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Book Review
As Edmund Burke said, "The greater the power, the more dangerous the abuse." This is sometimes excruciatingly true with parents. There are the typically anxious ones who get a little uptight about letting their teenagers borrow the car, and then there are the rigid kinds who won't even let their kids leave the house when they want to--or even eat or go to the bathroom when they need to.

Written for the 14 million adult children who've survived an upbringing with the latter type of parents, If You Had Controlling Parents takes the classic Toxic Parents to a new level. Author Dan Neuharth, Ph.D., a family therapist, knows his subject thoroughly; he survived a childhood with a father who has the candor to refer to himself as "an S.O.B."

Neuharth says, "If your parents controlled you in unhealthy ways, they may have...



Divorcing a Parent : Free Yourself from the Past and Live the Life You've Always Wanted
Beverly Mfcc Engel
044990590X
May 14, 1991
Paperback
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Book Description
Do you come away from contact with your parent with unbearable feelings of rage, low self-esteem and depression?

Is your parent hypercritical, manipulative, and/or controlling?

Do you feel unsafe when you are with your parent because of verbal abuse, negligence, or inappropriate behavior?

No matter how much you do for your parent, is it never enough?

No one should have to endure an abusive, unhealthy relationship that threatens his or her well-being -- even if that relationship is with a parent. In this ground-breaking book, Beverly Engel draws on her own personal experience, as well as the stories and letters of other adult children, to offer a complete guide to why, when and how to divorce a parent. Engel discusses good and bad reasons for taking this step, when to stop trying to...


Charred Souls: A Story of Recreational Child Abuse
Trena Cole
097235350X
December 2002
Paperback
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Hope M. Chema, M.D.
"As I read chapter after chapter, I felt such pain for that little girl."

Madelaine Pinkus Rohn, Ph.D., LCSW
This book...gives the reader a window into the experience of a child, and the suffering that was relentlessly endured."

See all Editorial Reviews


Forgiving Our Parents, Forgiving Our Selves
David A. Stoop
0830734236
Feb 1997
Paperback
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Book Description
Now with a twenty-page study guide. Many people have been helped by this valuable book, first published five years ago, which addresses those of us who desperately want to change but can't stop behaving in ways that hurt us and those we love. The authors assure us that we can change these hurtful patterns. Drs. Stoop and Masteller believe you can move beyond failure to forgiveness, cancelling the indebtedness of those who have hurt you. But before you can begin the process of forgiveness, you need to understand the roots of your pain, through exploring the family patterns that perpetuate dysfunction. When you understand your family of origin, you will be able to take the essential step of forgiveness.

About the Author
David Stoop is a psychological counselor and bestselling...


You Want Me to Work with Who : Eleven Keys to a Stress-Free, Satisfying, and Successful Work Life ... No Matter Who You Work With
Julie Jansen
0143036807
February 2006
Paperback
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Book Description
In I Don’t Know What I Want . . . But I Know It’s Not This, career consultant Julie Jansen won over readers with the same comforting, clear headed approach that she brings to her many Fortune 500 clients. Now she tackles a problem that affects every working person, regardless of occupation: difficult people. Whether the problem is an "abusive" boss, "toxic" coworker, or "difficult" assistant, Jansen shows how to master the eleven keys to getting along with even the most dysfunctional colleagues. Featuring self-assessment exercises designed to identify the root causes of problem behavior and smart, viable solutions and tips for managing different kinds of difficult people—from subordinates to superiors—this invaluable resource is a savvy, humane guide to reducing stress, establishing...


Addict in the Family
Beverly Conyers
156838999X
Sept 2003
Paperback
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Book Description
This book is for the hidden victims of addiction--families. For families of addicts, feeling of fear, shame, confusion over a loved one's addiction can cause deep anxiety, sleepless nights, and even physical illness. And the emotional distress family members suffer is often compounded by the belief that they somehow caused or contributed to their loved one's addiction--or that they could have done something to prevent it. As the heart-wrenching personal stories in this book reveal, family members do not cause their loved one's addiction. Nor can they control of cure addiction. What family members can do is find support, set bounderies, detach with love--and eventually discover how to enjoy life whether their loved one finds recovery of not. "Addict in the Family" is a book about sorrow, deception, and pain. More...


The Batterer as Parent: Addressing the Impact of Domestic Violence on Family Dynamics (Sage Series on Violence Against Women) (SAGE Series on Violence against Women)
Lundy Bancroft, Jay G. Silverman
0761922776
March 19, 2002
Paperback
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Review
Judge Bobbi Alpers : "This book beautifully educates the reader on the world in which batterers live and raise their children. Judges, lawyers, and others in decision-making roles will find this information very helpful in crafting appropriate decisions regarding a child’s safe contact with a battering parent." 
Barbara Hart : "Excellent. I’ve been waiting for this book. It is a crisp, cogent, comprehensive exegesis on batterers, their parenting styles, their custody litigation practices, and the adverse impact of their violence on battered mothers and their children. A must read for attorneys, advocates, custody evaluators, judges, and batterer intervention service providers." 
Joan Zorza : "This is by far the clearest and most insightful book to appear on domestic...


Violence in Intimate Relationships (Claremont Symposium on Applied Social Psychology)
Ximena B. Arriaga (Editor), Stuart Oskamp (Editor)
0761916431
June 10, 1999
Paperback
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Book Description
What are the roots of violence between spouses? What do we know about the precursors of wife battering? Who are the victims of domestic abuse? This book discusses causes and precursors of violence, exploring the psychological characteristics of perpetrators of violence, and describing and evaluating potential responses to it. Each chapter contributes to the reader’s understanding of violence in intimate relationships. Part I establishes the "what" and the "who" of violence; Part II examines the interpersonal and situational context that may contribute to violent interaction, or the "how" and "why" that underlie violent interactions; and Part III provides an account of what happens to victims as a result of physical and psychological abuse and how relationships change...


Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child
John E. Bradshaw
0553353896
February 1992
Paperback
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From AudioFile
Listeners may need a few minutes to get past Bradshaw's pronounced twang. Once over this hurdle, one is captivated by his mission to heal the early hurts of wounded adults. He accomplishes this with a delivery that is genuine, sincere and confidence-building; his delivery varies from personal and comforting to expansive and comic. He provides moments for private meditation, as well as the feeling of a shared group experience. Except for one instance when a hokey angelic chorus enters, the choice of music is pleasant and unobtrusive. E.F.A. (c)AudioFile, Portland, Maine --This text refers to the Audio Cassette edition.


A Long Way Off
Kitti Murray
0805427759
Apr 2004
Paperback
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Book Description
There is an agony in waiting that is only known by those parents who have sat on the porch and gazed down the long road that once led their child away from home. Now they hope this road will them lead them back. How can a parent find peace in these moments and days of hopeful, yet tepid, anticipation? A Long Way Off offers these parents the opportunity to begin the healing regimen. It is a regimen because there are no magic wand fixes. Kitti Murray’s thoughts are like a spiritual salve on open wounds. She leads you to Scriptures and offers you the opportunity to respond with your own thoughts and prayers on journaling pages. A Long Way Off will help you find hope and healing amidst the pain.

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